Spreading the Message of BAHBAD

I will never forget the day I "happened" to stumble upon Evan's caringbridge site. It was off of Henry Tuckers caringbridge site, who is a child whose care I was not personally involved with, but happen to see his site in the web browser history here at Riley. So...out of boredom one night I went to check on sweet Henry Tucker, and on his site was a prayer request for Evan Cousineau. It was a day back in october when the Cousineaus found out that there was a chance that they might not get to bring Evan home, a dream that never came true for him. I remember being absolutely CAPTURED by his beautiful face, and when I read the the journal entries leading up to that day... I cant really explain it, but there was no turning back. I read through the entire journal, twice, and was permanently changed from those days onward. Somewhere during the time surrounding Evan's death, I contacted Gina to let her know how much Evan's story had impacted me as a person, how l lived my life, and how i practiced as a pediatric oncology nurse. It is immeasurable, the changes that have occurred for the better, since I have "met" Evan Cousineau. I am a better person, and a far better nurse... Although there are never words that can adequately express my sadness when children pass away, because of Gina and her journey of grief I have a sort of understanding that helps me to BE THERE for my patients and families in a way that i never could before. I have always loved "my kids" to the point where frequently I am being told, "Julie watch your heart, you're not going to survive if you continue to love so deeply." Well, guess what. Thats what I am here for... I will continue to love these children forever.
I always knew I wanted to be a part of Evan's Entourage, but in what capacity, I didnt know. Ever since I can remember I have always had an impossibly competitive attitude, and of course, was worried that I would try and fail miserably. I talked to so many people in this area about getting involved in marrow registry and active recruitment, but like Gina always mentions... for so many people its just a taboo topic. I was constantly being turned down, by friend and stranger, and consequently would become quite discouraged at times. One day last year when Gina and I were working on collages for a drive in Minnesota she said, why dont you just come down for a visit. We'll go to the colts game! Well... thats all it took for me. I could meet the family that has been such an inspiration to me AND see a Colts game!!! Life was GOOD. :) So, fast forward a couple of weeks... and there I was in southern cal, welcomed into the house of this perfect family as if I were one of their own. I jumped on the tramp with Derek and Alaina (Evan's tramp!) we went to an AMAZING smoothie place.. we had a CRAZY funny trip to Michaels craft shop.. and we held a marrow drive at Alainas track meet. While the drive wasnt hugely successful in numbers, it succeeeded in proving to me that truly, i could run my own drive. I do not need to have a bunch of people on board with me, I only need my own desire to save lives and the rest will fall into place.
The day after I flew home from Cali, I took the trip from indianapolis to south bend to speak directly with my former nursing professors and a couple of dedicated nursing students, empowered them with the knowledge of how they can save lives... and the ball began to roll. Contacts were made with many senior people from the college, who to my surprise were immediately on board with our cause. Gina walked me through all the steps of who to contact and what to arrange, and truthfully... until I showed up the day of, I still had no idea what I was getting myself into!!! Sure, I was in contact with Gina and a Marrow.org rep, and yes I had as many things arranged prior to the event as I plan for... how can you possibly prepare for an event you've never experienced?!? Little things like, what will my table look like? what should i bring? will I get enough donors? will people react negatively to us? how can I attract people to the table to give them the chance to ask questions? how do I make this as approachable as possible so as to not only attract the willing donors, but also let the "naysayers" feel comfortable enough to speak and allow myself and friends to educate them? And most importantly, how do I MYSELF know that I am adequately prepared to be the leader and educator of a cause so much more than myself? So many things to stress about, so many reasons not to involve myself... but ONE BIG reason that all those tiny details dont come close to comparing to. And that is the children, the families, the patients... the ones in need. That is why I am here.
And with that, I showed up to a room full of willing volunteers.. most of whom I had never met, and spoke to them from my heart. I talked for about 30 minutes and after that every single person asked to be involved. Wow, what a feeling. We then collaborated on our set up... I had brought several photos, one girl brought poster boards and others brought markers, etc... between all of us, we created a beautiful display. One that invited every single person who walked by to atleast consider our cause. My volunteers were all nursing students who have the desire to save lives in any way possible, and that they did. They quickly absorbed the information, and spread it to their friends, their friends friends... and every stranger that would allow it. Their excitement for the cause was so obvious by every single person that you just couldnt help but want to join. I can count on one hand how many people approached our table and didnt join, and its like I told the girls... you've planted a seed of knowledge into their head that perhaps someday will evolve into a sense of responsibility for these people, and one day... maybe they will run their own drive. What a neat idea.
There were alot of very powerful moments during the drive that I feel absolutely compelled to share. The first one being an encounter I had with the Medical Ethics professor at the college. Medical Ethics happened to be one of my favorite classes during college, and that being said... I know EXACTLY how these minds work. A sense of morality gives a person the "high ground" to do things that would otherwise seem unbearable, for the sake of "doing right." So, all I needed to do was show her how it is our responsibility as healthy persons to give to those who are in need. In the begining she was very sternly against the idea of being on the registry, mostly because of the potential pain it might involve, but other excuses were also mentioned. Just as we are responsible for fighting for the unborn, for fighting for the needy, for fighting for those who cannot provide or protect themselves, we are responsible for fighting for the sick, and how can we "fight" for them if we ourselves are not willing to "give." Of course I reinforced the notion that right now, she is fortunately healthy... but one day, the story might change and she might find herself in need... and that day, she will wish the entire country was on the registry. After a few minutes of conversation, she not only found herself signing up to be a donor but also asking if I would be interested in speaking to her Ethics class. WOW! Other stories include those of my close friends, who were so very scared to join... against it. "What are you doing, Julie??" "you're crazy... no ones gonna want to do that" Ha...i sure showed them. And then they too found themselves signing up as willing donors to anyone in need! Wonderful. So proud of all these girls.